Unquiet

Hilarious Experience

2006-06-29T00:59:00.001-07:00

As soon as my exams were over, I was bombed with information of various prospective grooms. My preferences were asked(“Would you like a slim guy like yourself or should we go for a healthy, athletic one)

“I would prefer a slim one” I said, Since all the healthy athletic types turned out be Overweight uncles. If you don’t know what an Uncle is, here is a definition:

Uncle( Slang) : A guy in 25-30ies who looks like in forties. His characteristics are overweight or obese, Diminishing Hair & most of the weight around stomach, sometimes less heighted. Has earned lot of money & expects a very beautiful wife. Describes himself as Healthy or athletic.

There was one profile which mummy really liked but since they had not sent any pictures of the guy, we had no idea how he looked. So Mum called them on phone to request a photo, but they got so excited that they invited themselves over our house. Poor mum could not refuse them & agreed.

They were to come in the evening & so mummy began to give me tips about how to impress them (Which she had already recited hundreds of times before!).There was an exhilarated atmosphere in the house as we waited for the ‘groom-to-be” .

Their family came in a big car(they brought all the relatives that could fit in the car!).As there seemed 2-3 guys, my mother welcomed them & politely asked which one was the groom.

The groom was a total Uncle! Standing besides both the parents & sweating, he looked like he was coming for a board exam. He introduced himself, But we did not understand a word of what he said, So my father asked him to repeat again

Father:So what is your occupation?

Mr.Groom: errr…..I…..mmm. I am a manager.

My Father: A manager? In what firm?

His father: He is a manager at xyz firm. He is very honest & sincere person.

My father: What are your hobbies?

Mr.Groom: um……………….i……….like…………..tv.

His Father: He loves traveling, reading, sports.

All the conversation was interpreted by his father, while the guy was totally confused about what to answer

Both my parents understood that this was not a suitable match. But their family was not ready to let go easily. While I conversing in fluent English, the groom was having problems in speaking even a simple line.

We laughed for an hour on the groom after they went away.

Next day they called up mom & said that they really liked me! But my mother declined their offer saying it would not be a good match.

P.S.: Hearty Congratulations to Preeti, who has found the man of her dreams. May God Bestow them with all the happiness they deserve.

Lines from HER & HIS diaries

2006-06-13T20:52:00.000-07:00

I got this funny forward in mail today :

HER DIARY-

I asked him what was wrong - he said, "Nothing."
I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He
said it had nothing
to do with me and not to worry.

On the way home, I told him that I loved him, but he
simply smiled and
kept driving.

I can't explain his behavior; I don't know why he
didn't say, "I love you
too."

When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him, as if
he wanted nothing to
do with me anymore.

He just sat there and watched TV; he seemed distant
and absent.

Finally, I decided to go to bed. About 10 minutes
later he came to bed.

I decided that I could not take it anymore, so I
decided to confront him
with the situation but he had fallen asleep.
I started crying and cried until I fell asleep.
I do not know what to do. I'm almost sure that his
thoughts are with
someone else.

My life is a disaster.

HIS DIARY-

Yesterday India lost the cricket match again. DAMM IT.

Really we lost yesterday........

For Deserving Women........

2006-05-14T23:23:00.000-07:00

Read this quote at thinkexist.com & loved it:

Women are like apples on trees, the best ones are on the top of the tree. The men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and don't want to get hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't so good but easy. So, the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality they are amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top because they value quality.

I have many friends going through the same situation, who are talented, attractive but are unable to find their life partners. I hope this cheers them up.

Neighbour's Wedding

2006-04-29T23:55:00.000-07:00

Last week, one of my neighbour’s daughter got married. Our whole area was in shock at the news of marriage. She was a good natured girl but unfortunately her physical appearance was hideous (Don’t get me wrong, but she was really ugly!).All gossiping aunties in our area had predicted that she would never get married! But a week later she got a proposal from a very good family, the groom was a Harvard Graduate but had a slight deformity of hands (two fingers fused together. He had the looks of handsome man (looked little like um...maybe Amir khan)

Everything went so swiftly that the girl was married within a month leaving everyone in the colony astounded! Now everyone is worried about good looking girls of our area!

A Picture Worth Thousand Words..........

2006-04-23T10:54:00.000-07:00

I got this picture in mail today with the message:

Don't wait for the perfect man.............coz you will never find one. ;-)

Picture Chaos

2006-04-21T00:26:00.000-07:00

I came home from long vacation & found proposals flooded in my Inbox (Thanks to my mother!).It has become so easy to send proposals that it has become convenient way to communicate with prospective relatives. Anyway, as I started to scan each proposal, I was amused to find the quality of photos of each er….groom. Almost every one had a sent a studio photo in various weird poses, like they were heroes in blockbuster movies. Behind them was a colourful image background which was bright & deceptive, it made me unable to perceive the real health & height of the person.

But the most hilarious aspect was, every person had picture taken for matrimonial purpose( Probably), but the expression on their face was totally queer, nobody had a courtesy to smile (You are never fully dressed until you wear a smile), on the contrary, their expressions depicted as “I- am-standing-near-a-garbage can-smelling-badly” with crinkled nose.

When a bloke seemed no bigger than a dwarf in his photo, his profile indicated he was 5”9. It took me 5 mins to imagine him as tall but I couldn’t (maybe because of funny multicolored shirt). Another guy mentioned he was mentioned when his photo indicated his weight to be nearly of a half grown elephant (………or a hippo!)

When my mother came (excitedly) to ask to me if I had liked anybody, I showed her the slideshow of guys & she got dejected.

I understand that nobody is perfect, but is it so hard to get a normal picture of self (with a decent smile)??Or pictures are purposely edited to depict a good image?? Maybe I should stop checking emails.

NRI Madness

2006-03-24T23:48:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, my mother’s not-so-distant friend paid us a visit. She is a typical orthodox woman who tends to show-off. Her daughter Sweety* is of same age as me & so both the mothers tend to talk on matrimonial subject.

Aunty: So, have you found a boy for Rhea

My Mom:( Taking a deep breath) No, not yet. But we are still searching. What about Sweety?

Aunty: We are looking for her, but it is getting difficult.

Mom: Why?

Aunty: We are finding a NRI for Sweety, but now days NRI’s are hard to find. They are more interested in marrying Phirangi(foreign) girls.You know, for Greencard.

Mom: Why do want a NRI, Indian boys are good too.

Aunty: Oh no, Indian boys are nothing, NRI today are earning a fortune.

Mom: On the contrary, Indian Boys are earning equivalent to NRI’s salaries today.

Aunty: Maybe, but Indians do not match upto NRI’s Standards.

At that point, both mom & I understood that Aunty only wanted an NRI groom for show-off. To Show their high standard. Most of Middle class families have this same mentality. This is given rise to crime. Many Indian girls get married to NRI with dreams of getting rich, but the NRI (Non Reliable Indian) guy leaves the girl in India and never returns. I felt an impulse to tell this to Aunty, but I knew it would fall on deaf ears.

(*Names have changed to protect identity)

Amusing Story

2006-03-17T02:02:00.000-08:00

I got this story today in a forwarded mail:

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in bed.
She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him
sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of him. He
appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he
wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee. "What's the
matter, dear?" she
whispers as she steps into the room.

"Why are you down here at this time of night ?"

The husband looks up from his coffee, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we
were dating, and you were only 16?" he asks solemnly.

"Yes I do" she replies.

The husband pauses; the words were not coming easily.

"Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my
car.............?"
"Yes, I remember" said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.

The husband continued.. "Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my
face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter, or I'll send you to jail for
20 years?".

"I remember that too" she replied softly. He wiped another tear from his
cheek and said,

"I would have been released today! "

Wedding Fever

2006-03-16T02:21:00.000-08:00

Marriage has officially become the hot subject of our house. My parents are excited & nervous at the same time. Finding a groom is a big responsibility, they tell me, while I savor their happy but tense expression.

Everything under this subject has become the topic of conversation. Discussions also include where the wedding should be held, how many relatives to be invited, how much shopping to do & where to do.

Yesterday when we went out for shopping, when I saw my mother admiring a saree.

Me:Do you like the saree?

Mom:Yes, it is Beautiful.

Me: Mom, if you like the saree, why don’t you buy it?

Mom: No, the saree is too expensive; I will buy this one at the time of your wedding.

Me: I don’t think this saree will remain here till my marriage, just buy it now.Wear it during my wedding.

Mom: let it be, This saree is not that good.I will buy sarees expensive then this one.

(why did I bother!)

My parents are gradually becoming typical filmi type Ma-Babuji. Once modern, they are now saying many filmi dialogues they can remember ( Beti Toh Paraya Dhan hoti hai, etc)

I don’t understand, is this happening only with my parents or this is the case with all the parents. Agreed, that a marriage is a big event in girl’s or even her parent’s life but there in no need to overreact. I wonder what will happen next. God Bless Me.

Happy Holi

2006-03-15T01:44:00.000-08:00

Happy Holi to everyone. May this festival fill your life with colours of joy.

Marriage : An Indian Perspective

2006-03-15T00:32:00.000-08:00

Mar·riage ()

n. The legal union of a man and woman as husband and wife.

(Courtesy Dictionary.com)

Marriage’s definition is very different in India.A country influenced by Sanskars, ethics & relationships, Marriage are not just a union of two people; it is a union of two families, cultures.

As a girl grows up in India, parents start to find a suitable groom. This process was easier a century ago, when girls were not interested in career & contended themselves with house keeping. Boys too, were less demanding, education of girl did not matter, as long as girls knew cooking & brought a good dowry with them.

Those times have changed now, but the process is still the same. The parents still find a groom for the girl, but now the girl is career oriented with big dreams in her eyes. She wants an understanding husband who does not want to confine her in the house. The boy has changed too. He now wants an Intelligent yet beautiful girl (regardless of his own appearance) and is ok with career oriented woman as long she manages both house & work efficiently, and yes she should adjust with his parents. With expectations of both bride’s & groom’s risen much higher, it has become harder to find the right person.

Welcome To My Blog

2006-03-14T00:18:00.000-08:00

I am finally proceeding towards the path of Blogosphere. This blog will reflect my insights, revelations & doubts as I experience life's moments.